You may have heard the term “Gray Divorce” floating around lately. It simply means couples who split after 50, often after decades together. And according to recent research, it’s happening more and more.

Here’s what the numbers say, and what couples can do to keep their bond strong.

The Numbers Tell an Interesting Story

Overall, divorce rates in the U.S. are actually at their lowest point in decades. But there’s a catch. A Purdue University study found that marriage rates in the 2020s are also at historic lows. Fewer people are getting married in the first place.

For adults over 50, the trend goes the other way. A study by researchers Susan L. Brown and I-Fen Lin found that 36 percent of all divorces filed in the U.S. now involve adults over 50. And while overall divorce rates have dropped, the rate among Americans over 50 has actually gone up.

The same research noted that women are more often the ones initiating these divorces. Men, on the other hand, tend to remarry more quickly afterward.

Why is this happening? Rosie Shrout, an assistant professor in the Department of Human Development and Family Science at Purdue University, offered this explanation: “Some possible reasons for gray divorce are because of our increased longevity. People are less willing to endure unhappy marriages for so long and are more optimistic that they will find another partner. And so older adults are more willing to divorce than they were in the past.”

When Two People Become Roommates

Many long-term couples aren’t dealing with serious conflict. The problem is quieter than that. Researchers call it Roommate Syndrome, when two people have gotten very good at sharing a home but have stopped investing in a deeper connection.

Retirement can make this worse. Suddenly you’re together all day, every day, with fewer outside activities pulling you in different directions. That kind of togetherness, without intention behind it, can actually strain a marriage.

Small Changes That Can Make a Big Difference

The good news is that a stagnant relationship can be revived. One place to start: make sure you each have your own hobbies and interests. Having something of your own, whether it’s reading, woodworking, gardening, or anything else, gives you something to bring back to your partner. That spark of individual enthusiasm is good for both of you.

When you do spend time together, try to step outside your usual routine. It doesn’t have to cost much. A walk somewhere new, a pottery class, a new workout at the gym; anything that creates a fresh experience together can help keep the marriage alive.

The point isn’t to pretend nothing has changed after 30 or 40 years together. It’s to keep making new memories and to keep choosing each other along the way.